Next Sunday is Father’s Day, at least here in the USA (The tradition is celebrated on different dates around the world). As we turn our hearts and minds to fathers everywhere, let’s take a look at certain aspects of what it means to be a Father and the leadership influences of fatherhood.
Who and what you do in a leadership role may be directly influenced by the father figure you had. Good or bad, right or wrong, the impact on young lives meted out at the hands of our fathers drives us. Perhaps it’s time to reform your view of fatherhood so that your leadership influence can get on a better track.
Much of our current view on fatherhood comes, sadly, from pop culture. Movies and TV make our Dad characters out to be odd, clumsy, goofy, or obnoxious oafs. There aren’t too many quality characters playing lead roles from which we can draw conclusions about what it means to be a Dad.
Tradition plays a role too. Father’s get straddled with deciding which values they want to pass on to the next generation, if they have any values to share at all. The values and ideals that are present were passed down from generations before. It’s a domino effect. Attitudes about race, creed, and culture were either forced or mandated. Many are not that good to start with.
What is a young person to do? How do you decide what kind of Dad you want to be? Here are a few thoughts to consider.
Do an Inventory
Look at the structure and quality of the things you may have been taught as you grew up. After going out “into the world’ you certainly have experienced push back on many of them. How can that that feedback help you make changes?
Maybe what you were told about other people is just plain wrong. Or maybe the standards you were given are too low or too high. Demands to follow in someone’s footsteps can be stifling if that vocation does not suit you. I’ve known far too many people in my life who are miserable in their jobs because they went a direction dictated by a dominant father figure. Loyalties to schools were demanded and young lives suffered.
Include these considerations when you take inventory. If too many aspects are misaligned, consider a course correction.
Plot Your Own Course
Get out from under the spell. Seek alternative direction that is better for you. Yes, I know this can sound a bit too simplistic. Yet, making these kinds of changes can have monumental effect on the outcome.
Your whole career may be needing a make-over.
Find a Better Role Model
If real world experience has shown you that the model you grew up with needs adjustment, then find another model. Seek out and connect with a mentor. Find community leaders who may want to share their wisdom and experience.
Reset the mold. Invest in learning new and different things about who you are and what you should be doing.
People of faith should dive deeper into the teachings of their faith. Forget the biases from an earthly father and the traditions of failed generations before that. Go straight to the core of your faith. Find the central figure there who can guide and renew your understanding of why you are here and what you should be doing.
The Job Description
Fatherhood is somehow synonymous with leadership, or at least I submit it should be. If you are now a father at home but a lousy leader, then you’ve got some work to do. Or if your work team gets far more positive influence from you than your family does, you have some work to do.
[reminder]What will you do about reshaping your view of fatherhood?[/reminder]