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Make Life More Fulfilling: Discover Your Life Purpose

Do you wake up each day dreading the idea of spending another day at work? You might even feel the need to be a part of something bigger and more meaningful. If you’ve failed to discover and build your life around your life purpose, you might feel dissatisfied with your life. Determining the purpose of your life can be a simple process.

It can take a bit of work to uncover the truth, but it’s within you. It’s waiting to be unearthed and utilized.

Living a life that’s congruent with your purpose will allow you to start each day with a smile, hope, and a plan. It’s a tool for connecting with something meaningful outside yourself. Everyone has a different “why”. The trick is to determine the “why” that fits your values and talents.

If your life is in a rut, discovering your life purpose is the first step to a life filled with passion and contentment.

“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”

– Eleanor Roosevelt

The Benefits of Discovering and Living Your Life Purpose

Maybe you hold the belief that work is called “work” for a reason. You might think that life is hard, boring, and that enjoyment is only for children and retirees. All stages of life can be meaningful and exciting. Knowing that you’re living the life that’s right for you is the key to finding enjoyment each day.

The advantages of knowing your life purpose are far-reaching:

You’ll enjoy focus and clarity. When you’re not spending your time and efforts on the things that matter to you, your focus is elsewhere. When you’re not clear on your purpose, it’s hard to make effective decisions.

Lacking direction, focus, and purpose is no way to go through life. Knowing your purpose makes life simpler.

Life will be more fun! When you know your purpose and live it each day, life has the opportunity to be more enjoyable. With your fears and doubts in the rearview mirror, you’re in a better position to enjoy yourself.

It enhances your passion for life. Spending your day on the things that are most important to you will release your passion. You’ll feel the enthusiasm you had as a child. With a compelling future and a high level of motivation, you become unstoppable. This is missing from a life without a clear purpose.

You become part of something bigger than yourself. You’ll have a sense of certainty that’s both comforting and peaceful. It’s a chance to make a big and meaningful contribution to the world.

Discovering the answer to the question, “What is the purpose of my life?” will change your life forever. How can you determine your life purpose?

As you’ll see, there are several strategies.

 “The human race is a monotonous affair. Most people spend the greatest part of their time working in order to live, and what little freedom remains so fills them with fear that they seek out any and every means to be rid of it.”

– Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Questions to Reveal the Purpose of Your Life

It’s impossible to find your purpose without a degree of self-reflection. Answers are the result of asking questions. Asking the right questions will provide the answers you seek. When you ask yourself questions, it’s imperative to listen to the answers. The response you receive can be very subtle and quiet. Keep an open mind.

Be sure to record your answers!

Ask yourself these useful questions:

If you only had a year to live, how would you spend it? With the clock ticking, we’re much more able to focus on the important stuff and let everything else go.

  • The things that come to mind are worthy of further consideration. Could you spend your life engaged in one of these ideas?
  • Just reminding yourself that you’re going to die one day can be helpful. The reminder that your time is limited can reduce the habit of wasting time and being indecisive.

How do you want others to remember you? What would you like your obituary to say? How would you like your children, friends, and other family members to remember you?

  • Make a conscious decision about how you’d like others to remember you and put together a plan to live that life.

What did you love to do as a child that you no longer do? As children, we’re quite clear about what we like and don’t like. In addition, younger children aren’t concerned with the perceptions of others. We do things solely because we like them when we’re 6-years old. What have you given up over the years?

  • As we become teenagers, social pressure and the need to impress others can steer us away from the things we love.
  • In young adulthood, we become overly concerned with the practicality of our choices. “Can I make enough money at this to have a decent lifestyle?”
  • With a little thought, you can find a way to make a living doing what you love. Life is short. Consider what you once loved to do and find a way to incorporate it back into your life.

What type of discomfort can I handle? Everything is awful part of the time. Living your life’s purpose will have its disadvantages. What can you handle?

  • If you dream of being an artist, musician, writer, or actor, you’ll be rejected at least 95% of the time.
  • If you want to create a law firm, you’ll spend at least a decade working 80-hours each week.
  • Do you want to be a teacher? Can you handle the parents and the children that constantly disrupt class?
  • If you can’t handle the worst aspects of pursuing your purpose, consider reconsidering your choice.

What topics and activities make you lose track of time? Have you ever gotten so involved with a conversation or an activity that you missed a meal or were amazed by how much time had passed?

  • Maybe you lose track of time when you play the guitar. However, take another step in your thinking. Is it the guitar specifically or music in general? Is it the guitar or the process of competing with yourself and seeing improvement?
  • Make a list of the times you’ve been so focused that you forgot about everything else.
  • Imagine if you had a career that incorporated this phenomenon. You’d never have to “work” another day again!

What do you dream about doing but are too afraid of? Admit it. There’s something you fantasize about, but you can’t quite get yourself to take action. It might be climbing Mount Everest, writing a screenplay, or becoming a doctor.

  • Why haven’t you taken the first step? In many cases, you’ll find your resistance to trying something new is fear. Often, it’s the fear of failing, especially failing in front of others.
  • Keep in mind that the only way to become good at something is to work through the initial period of being bad at it. It’s unlikely that your first script will be purchased. In fact, it will probably be awful. But the next attempt will be better. It takes time to become good at a new skill.
  • The more embarrassment you can handle, the greater your ultimate success.

How could you best serve the world? Of all the challenges that exist in the world, how could you best solve one of them?

  • True happiness requires contributing to something outside yourself.
  • It’s not possible to solve any of the world’s problems alone. You’ll be forced to work constructively and creatively with others. This could be the kind of fulfillment you seek.
  • Make of list of all the ways your skills, interests, and talents could benefit the world in a meaningful way.

Did you ask yourself every question? Did you record your answers?

How can you use the answers to enhance your life?

Introspection is a necessary part of finding your life purpose. Ask yourself the important questions and listen to the answers.

“A small change can make a big difference. You are the only one who can make our world a better place to inhabit. So, don’t be afraid to take a stand.”

– Ankita Singhal

7 More Questions to Reveal Your Life Purpose

If the above approaches haven’t satisfied your quest, there are additional questions you can answer. While meditation and writing can be highly effective, some of us have greater success with more conventional means. Avoid giving up. There’s too much at stake to stop.

Spend a few minutes on each question before moving on to the next:

What are your greatest regrets? Which missed opportunities do you regret the most? Is there a skill you wish you had started learning years ago? What decisions would you change if given a second chance?

  • What career would choose if you could go back in time and be 18-years old again? Is it really too late now?

Who inspires you the most? Think about the people that fill you with feelings of respect and admiration.

  • What is it about them that inspires you? Could you incorporate some of these same qualities in yourself? Could you live a similar life?

What are your natural talents? In what areas have you always excelled? Do you understand complex ideas? Is it your social skills? Are you musically talented? Are you compassionate and considerate?

  • While you can learn to be good at anything, you can save a lot of time if you’re able to put your natural abilities to work. Imagine the progress you’d make after 10 years of effort using your natural abilities rather than starting from scratch.
  • If you believe that you were born with a particular purpose, it only makes sense that the necessary talents would be provided to you, too.

What makes you feel good about yourself? If you could spend most of your time doing things that make you feel great, your life would be pretty wonderful!

  • Create a list of all the things you do that make you feel good about yourself.

If you had to teach a subject, what would you choose? It’s only enjoyable to teach subjects that you like. The subject you’d like to teach is a good candidate for your life purpose.

In what areas do people ask you for help? Most of us wouldn’t ask a homeless person for stock tips. We ask people for advice that we believe have a level of expertise higher than our own.

  • Do others constantly ask you for relationship advice?
  • Do people ask you about spiritual matters?

Imagine you’re 80-years old, what memories do you want to have? Imagine you’re sitting on your front porch swing. What would you like to claim as your past? What type of relationships would you like to have experienced? What do you want to have accomplished?

  • How can you make this ideal past become your present?

You now have a good idea of your life purpose. The next step is determining how to incorporate the knowledge into your life. Ideas are the easy part. It’s the implementation that’s challenging.

“As the struggle for survival has subsided, the question has emerged: survival for what? Ever more people have the means to live, but no meaning to live for.”

– Viktor E. Frankl

Make Your Purpose a Part of Your Life

It’s great that you’ve narrowed down your primary reason for living, but how can you use that knowledge? Knowing something has minimal value if you’re not applying the knowledge. Focus on making small changes to your daily habits. Slow progress is the most reliable way to create major change in your life.

Let’s suppose your purpose is to help illiterate adults to read:

Look to the future. What does the end of your journey look like? Are you sitting at the library, helping someone learn to read? Are you in charge of a charity that serves those unable to read? Are you asking Bill Gates for $10,000,000 to fight for your cause?

What can you do today to get started? Starting is always the hardest part. What can you do today?

  • Learn more about illiteracy. What are the statistics? What are the causes? What is the best way to teach an adult to read?
  • What local resources are available? Can you contact them for advice?
  • Could you put an ad in Craig’s List and get started helping someone today?

Remind yourself of your purpose each day. Each morning and evening, take a minute to remind yourself of your purpose. Look to the future and feel excited. This is especially important on those challenging days that inevitably happen from time to time.

Track your progress. Keep a journal and list your successes and failures. How can you experience more successes and prevent future failures? Appreciate how far you’ve come.

Spread the word. If you’ve found your purpose in life, it’s your obligation to let the world know about it. How can you communicate the importance of adult illiteracy to the world? You’re not just a worker on this project. You’re also a messenger.

Realize that making a big difference requires big effort and time. Avoid letting the magnitude of your dreams overwhelm you. A little work and attention each day are cumulative. Your progress will shock you.

“It is not that we have so little time but that we lose so much. … The life we receive is not short but we make it so; we are not ill provided but use what we have wastefully.”

– Seneca

In Conclusion

Finding your life purpose changes the direction and emphasis of your life. If you haven’t taken the time to determine the purpose of your life, the quality of your experience on Earth has been limited. There are many advantages to discovering your unique purpose.

Introspection is a part of making this discovery. Self-reflective questions, meditation, and writing are all potential options. Use every method at your disposal until you’re satisfied with the answer you receive.

Today, more than ever, it’s possible to make a living doing a wide variety of things. You can live in Alaska and give tuba lessons to a student in Miami via skype. You can publish your own book without the need for a traditional publisher. There is a way to make a living while being true to your life purpose.

Find your purpose and reclaim your life.

If you need some help to explore these and other questions bout your personal purpose, I can help.

Accountability. What a Concept.

accountability

Yet who can really define it? Let’s take a look at leadership accountability.

Google the word and you get some interesting thoughts. Here are a few.

Accountability eliminates the time and effort you spend on distracting activities and other unproductive behavior. When you make people accountable for their actions, you’re effectively teaching them to value their work. When done right, accountability can increase your team members’ skills and confidence.

Accountability means living in integrity, with all your thoughts, words, and actions are consistent with one another and in alignment. Commitment is one thing, but accountability is vital to sustaining long-term success

In other words, the term doesn’t mean punishment; instead, it describes a willingness to accept responsibility for our own actions and their impact.

Henry Evans, the author of Winning with Accountability, defines it as “Clear commitments that — in the eyes of others — have been kept.” Here, the phrase “in the eyes of others” is key. In our organizations, accountability is not just about making and keeping commitments — it is also about transparency. When we make our commitments visible to our teammates, everyone is empowered to ask follow-up questions, check on progress, and help move work forward.

The Rub

Marine LTC Stuart Scheller has made news by denouncing his chain of command in Afghanistan for allowing the bombing at the Kabul Airport that resulted in the deaths of 13 U.S. Service members. He has gone so far as to resign his commission and forego his full retirement after 20+ years in the Corps.

Scheller’s basic call to action is to return to accountability in leadership. From his view, commanders were demanding accountability from subordinate troops yet abdicating their own accountability…

..all the way to Washington, D.C. His contention is that leaders (anywhere) must themselves be accountable.

I happen to agree with Scheller. My sense is that our political leaders (all of them, both parties) have abandoned basic principles of accountability. They have built systems and agencies to shield their collective actions to cover up any true visibility of the ramifications of their choices and actions.

What is any American able to do to connect all of the dots? When an executive order is issued, how can any of us really know the impact it has, whether positive or negative?

If you happen to have voted for the party in office all you can do is hope they are doing the things you thought they promised you. But are they? Where’s the accountability?

In recent years I’ve heard frequent mention of how overwhelming various Bills that have come out of Congress may be. Speaker Pelosi herself was once asked, “Do you know everything in this Bill?” Her reply was “No, let’s see what happens.” Really? That my friends, is not much accountability.

Power Corrupts

There is an old saying “Power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.”

I’ve experienced that myself on a very small scale. When I was a young Lieutenant in the Army, I was put in temporary command of a troop unit with some 450 soldiers who were assigned for training. Under the terms of the UCMJ (the Uniformed Code of Military Justice), I had simultaneous powers as prosecutor, judge, and jury.

If a soldier committed an infraction, they were brought to my ‘court.’ It became intoxicating for me. I could levy penalties, garnish wages, demote rank and impact a wide range of punitive actions. Unchecked I could seriously influence those under my command.

But for me, personally, I had a commitment to God. I was a Christian with real beliefs in a much higher power than my own. I was accountable to Him for what I might do to others here.

That accountability was called into action one day when I was feeling particularly smug about my command and the powers of the UCMJ. I won’t go into all the details, but the significance of the moment was that I checked in on my accountability. I was reminded of the vows and promises I had made to God about being the person He wanted me to be.

Invoking all the strength and might of a code written by other men (the UCNJ) was not the standard I was being called to honor. I changed my mindset about power. I was humbled to realize the code was important but had to be administered with honor and human decency. Yes, discipline could be applied, but the soldier who was subject to that discipline needed to be redeemed.

The Elected Career “Leader”

Anyone who has engaged in elected office as a career cannot possibly have the same sense of balance. How can I say that? I say it because I have known several Congressmen and Senators in my day. The ones who live by higher standards don’t make Washington a career. They go, serve, and try to impact the system. But in the end, they retreat.

They don’t run for re-election after a few terms. The system beats them down. They run headlong into the reality that to survive there, you must compromise everything. You cannot live by the higher standards. You cannot permit total transparency.

Why? Because deals must get made for the ‘system’ to work. Those deals are not always good for the constituents you say you represent. There is no leadership accountability. Those deals may not represent the real values you intend to live by.

This gets us back to leadership accountability.

Will your actions stand the test of the words you speak? Real leaders, elected or not, are accountable. In fact, they demand it. First of themselves and then from others.

Lead by example is an easy phrase to utter. But living by it day by day is a much bigger challenge. We need leaders who are accountable.

LTC Scheller, I am with you Sir. Soldier on!

The Truth Is in the Middle

Conflict resolution is a natural part of running a business; any business. Conflicts happen with customers, colleagues, and employees. In your personal life, you see conflict popping up at home with your spouse or your kids. Family dynamics can be a big source of conflict. Simply said, conflict is eveywhere.

As a coach, I get asked about dealing with conflict on a regular basis. My first answer is an old saying I was taught many years ago.

“The truth is in the middle.”

Seldom are you perfectly right or wrong. It is not very often that you are completely spot on with a solution. Instead there are always other considerations to weigh.

When two opposing ideas collide, the moment can be emotionally charged. One side can feel indignant if the other has dared to oppose the idea. The situation becomes a fight to the death.

It simply doesn’t have to be that way.

Emotionally mature leaders learn to look at conflict more objectively. Rather than jump immediately to one side or the other, the smart leader hears the arguments, then weighs the merits of each before making a decision.

Really great leaders seek the truth in the middle first. But if a settlement is still not there, you can move to this next idea.

The Marriage Bed

No relationship in life can be more complex than the marriage of a couple. Two otherwise independent souls agree to join together to become one couple.

On one hand it’s the definition of compromise. I give something up and you give something up so we can be together. Said outloud it sounds very unworkable.

However, to better understand the ways to solve conflict at work, I am going to borrow a guide from the Gottman Institute, an organization dedicated to helping marriages and families.

Drs. John and Julie Gottman present this exercise will help partners to make headway into the perpetually gridlocked problems you face in your relationship. It requires compromise.

Therefore the real question is about how can we reach a compromise?

The Art of Compromise

Step 1: Consider an area of conflict where you and your partner are stuck in perpetual gridlock. Draw two ovals, one within the other. The one on the inside is your Inflexible Area and the one on the outside is your Flexible Area.

Step 2: Think of the inside oval containing the ideas, needs, and values you absolutely cannot compromise on, and the outside oval containing the ideas, needs, and values that you feel more flexible with in this area. Make two lists.

Step 3: Discuss the following questions with your partner that feels most comfortable and natural for the two of you:

  • Can you help me to understand why your “inflexible” needs or values are so important to you?
  • What are your guiding feelings here?
  • What feelings and goals do we have in common? How might these goals be accomplished?
  • Help me to understand your flexible areas. Let’s see which ones we have in common.
  • How can I help you to meet your core needs?
  • What temporary compromise can we reach on this problem?

Applying these principles to a business situation may take some other thinking.

From a career standpoint, compromise is something that one must become comfortable with, particularly in leadership roles. Whether it’s negotiating a new contract with a vendor, discussing a potential new business venture, resolving a complaint or trying to reach an important business decision, mastering the art of compromise is key.

Compromise 6

Here’s how to do so effectively without giving up too much or putting yourself in a bad position.

First understand what is at stake. Prioritize the key issues in your own mind. Evaluate the real significance of the issue first.

Next, determine the potential outcomes. What will ultimately happen if you give in or stand your ground? How much of an impact would compromising have on your business? In many cases, you’ll likely find that giving in won’t have many repercussions at all.

Draw a mental line in the sand. Know your limits, focus on what is key to your longer term goals and vision.

Next, Genuinely listen. Stephen R. Covey encouraged seeking the win-win position. You have to listen carefully to find the opportunities for the win for each party.

Then, give something worthwhile. Recognize that the other party is also going to need to compromise to some degree. To reach that middle ground, you’ll need to be willing to give your opponent something worthwhile.

Finally, always be professional. When it comes to compromise, there’s always going to be those situations in which the results aren’t as favorable as you’d have liked. Regardless of outcome, it’s imperative that you maintain the utmost professionalism at all times.

Leadership Values

Becoming a leader who is effective at managing conflict and achieving compromise is easier than you think. However, it takes intentional effort, focused on facts not emotions. Other articles in my blog address these topics too.

Be a leader who is dedicated to delivering value. Value your people. Provide them with value day by day. Enrich and influence the lives of those around you. Lead your people to overcome the conflicts. That will become your legacy as a leader.

5 Ways for Leaders to Inspire Their Team

There’s a big difference between being a boss and being a leader. Anyone can be a boss, responsible for guiding their team and assigning tasks to different members of staff. But it takes something special to be a true leader.

A genuine leader inspires their team and motivates them to accomplish amazing things.

Effective leaders get to know their employees, so they can understand their strengths and weaknesses. This allows for effective delegation and increases the chances of each employee achieving personal and professional goals with the assistance of that leader.

If you’re working to become a more effective leader for your team, the key to success begins with inspiration. Here are some ways that you can motivate and inspire your people.

Set Clear Targets

Employees need to know what they’re working towardsto ensure that they’re on the right path. As a leader in your organization, it’s crucial to have a clear idea of what the overall vision of the business is and what you need to do to get there.

Setting goals for each employee that will help to drive you towards your overall target will help to keep your people focused. Measurable goals are also much easier to track, ensuring that your staff members can measure their performance and see how far they’ve come in a specific period of time.

Excellent goals are specific, clear, and easy to understand. It’s also worth choosing goals for your teams that help them to identify their importance in the company.

Deliver Ongoing Feedback

Feedback has always been an important factor in keeping team members focused and inspired. Around 65% of modern team members wish they had more feedback from their leaders.

Effective feedback tells your employees what they’re doing right,so they know how to boost their chances of success. It can also be a tool in helping employees to pinpoint issues that might be harming their performance in some ways.

Remember, giving feedback doesn’t just mean telling your staff they’re doing a good job or a bad one. Be specific with the feedback you provide, so your people can really learn.

Don’t be afraid to ask for feedback from your staff too. They could give you excellent insights into how to be a more effective leader.

Be Fair with Compensation

There’s more to keeping your team inspired than paying them the right salary. However, it’s hard for anyone to be invested in a job where they feel as though they’re not fully appreciated.

If you can’t offer the most competitive salary compared to the other companies in your space, ask what you can do to make their role more appealing to staff.

  • Can you deliver extra benefits and learning opportunities, so your employees feel like they’re accomplishing more when working with you?
  • Is it possible to provide more paid time off work, or more flexible scheduling, so your teams can arrange their days to suit them?

Think outside of the box when it comes to showing your teams that you understand their worth.

Create a Company to Be Proud Of

One of the biggest jobs many business leaders have is creating an image for the company. They need to be able to explain what the true mission and goals of the company are to team members, so they feel as though they’re a part of something important.

If you want your employees to feel inspired and motivated, then give them a target to get behind. Let them know how you’re making the world a better place, not just how you’re making as much money as possible.

  • Can you get involved with charities that your team members care about?
  •  Can you contribute to your community in a way that’s going to inspire team pride?

Find out what your employees care about and get involved.

Work on Communication

Finally, it’s hard for any team member to feel inspired if they don’t also believe that they have a voice in the company.They need to know that you take their insights and feedback seriously.

With that in mind, try to build a company culture around open communication and collaboration.

Ensure that your staff members can share their ideas on how to improve the business freely, without any scathing remarks or risk of negative feedback.

When your employees share their ideas on how to make things better, show them that you’re taking their ideas into account by highlighting the things you’ve done to see whether those ideas could work.

As a Leader, You Can Inspire Your Team

Employees are more inspired when they believe they have a significant ownership and investment in the company they work for.

Avoid making your employees feel like “just” a member of staff. They want to be a crucial part of the team. Build that feeling of comradery and see your leadership skills and team results soar.

If you have questions about any of these or would like to leave a comment, use the comment block below.

trust at work

Trust at Work – The Book

My new book “Trust at Work” has been released. Actually, I can’t take all the credit.

This project has been a collaborative effort with my frined, colleague and former fellow banker, Roger Ferguson. Roger introduced me to the Team Trust Model some 30 years ago. The book has been two years in the making.

It is packed with concepts, process, tools, and tactics to make trust bulding come to life. How to build trust is no longer the mysterious question. Now you have a practical process and the framework to actually attack the questions people bring towork; questions that block trust. Resolve your team’s questions and trust will grow.

The model has been a faithful go-to soluton that I have shared with hundreds of my clients. It helps business leaders at companies of all sizes tackle the issue of building trust at work.

Trust has been shown to be the #1 reason some teams perform so much better than others. If you want to imporve your team performance, morale, and commitment, you need Trust at Work.

For more information and to get the book, visit Team Trust or TrustatWork.online

Working the Plan – Step 3 in Team Trust

Leaders responsible for teams must cast a solid vision to define the purpose for their team. Your team needs to know why the team exists. Every good purpose needs a plan. How are we going to execute the vision we just agreed to pursue? Purpose and plan are critical parts of building team trust.

Leaders who have great vision need to translate the vision into a plan; an action plan. You can pull your team together to create the plan. That’s perfectly fine. But plan you must.

The plan helps map out the next steps, milestones, contingencies, and a host of other critical factors that cause your likelihood of success to rise. As the old saying goes, without a plan any road will get you there. You probably don’t want to travel some of those roads. That is why a plan helps.

Step 3

In the Team Trust Model, Step #3 is the Plan.

team trust model diagram showing all the steps

The questions your team members and employees may be asking about the plan include the following examples.

What are the steps to achieve results?

What does a ‘win’ look like?

Can I agree with what you think we’ll be doing to go from A to B to C?

Does the plan make sense to me?

Does anyone else think this plan is crazy?

Is there something we already know about a step in the plan that won’t work?

How can I comment on the plan?

Do you want my feedback?

A Story from the Field

During a coaching session on team trust, one client who was responsible for a large regional sales organization spoke about his plan. It involved a cradle-to-grave process for their sales cycle. The plan started with prospecting and funnel management, then went into client onboarding and order entry. Ultimately the plan ended with various aspects of client support and service obligations assigned to the originating salespeople.

After thinking about it, he said “Wow, I really should be doing more to look at this plan when I’m hiring people. I generally look for personality but having folks who can serve these other needs is very important too.”

Viola!

There’s another reason to have a well-articulated plan.

The plan gives you the path to get work done. You deliver on the plan. You work through the plan. Without a clear blueprint for success, your team will get stuck wondering what to do next.

Doing the Right Thing

There is one thing I’ve learned in all my years of executive leadership, it’s about the people. Assuming your hiring process is reasonably reliable i.e. identifying good talent suitable for what you need to do, then the team you build will want to do the right thing.

If you as a leader don’t show them what the right thing is, they freeze. Because they want to do the right thing, they definitely don’t want to do the wrong thing. Therefore they tread water, running in place not doing much of anything.

Your plan helps them understand the next steps that amount to the right thing to do. Then they can become effective at the work.

There is obviously a lot more you have to do managing the effort, but without clear definitions of what a win looks like and what success can mean, your team will struggle to move forward.

The more you can do to articulate the right plan for the work you need to be done, the better your chances of having a team that can trust the plan and is willing to commit their dedicated effort to get there. This is the way to build team trust.

trust at work

Copy These 5 Communication Skills From Top Leaders

Do you struggle with communicating effectively? Communication is a key part of success at work or in other parts of your life. Top leaders have practiced and mastered the skills that enable them to communicate so well. Luckily, you too can learn these same skills!

Follow these strategies to practice essential communication skills:

Learn to Listen

Top leaders know that listening is a crucial part of communication. Learn to love listening and engage in the stories of others.

Try to really pay attention during a conversation instead of being distracted by your phone or another device. Have one conversation at a time to give each person your full attention. 

Practice retelling the person’s story in your mind to get better at listening.

Everyone wants to be heard. Others will notice that you’re listening to them and will go away from your conversations thinking what a great communicator you are when all you did was listen.

Avoid Slang and Informalities

It’s normal to use slang or other types of informal language while talking to friends or family. However, business usually requires a more formal language set. Pay attention to who you’re talking to and make the necessary adjustments.

Slang, acronyms, and informalities can also make some people feel uncomfortable, especially if they’re not familiar with them.

Focus on Being Brief

Top leaders know that you don’t have to make a long speech to be effective.

Practice being brief and getting your point across with fewer words and less time. People appreciate brief conversations and respect others who don’t go off on tangents.

However, ensure you’re still providing enough information while you talk. You don’t want to be vague or miss important details.

This skill may take time to develop, so practice it often. The next time you have a conversation, try to get your point across with less talking. Try to summarize the important parts and only focus on them while you talk. 

Pay Attention to Other’s Emotions

When you talk, take note of how the other person is reacting. Words are powerful, and communication can affect people in many different ways.

You may want to learn psychology to understand emotions better.

Show sympathy and empathy when it’s appropriate during a conversation.

Look at things from the other person’s point of view without criticism or judgment.

Be Charismatic

Communication is easier for charismatic people, but you can learn this skill.

One of the most important aspects of charisma is confidence, but not arrogance or self-righteousness. Confident communicators know their value and worth, but they’re also respectful of others.

Another facet of charisma is optimism, and it’s also a big part of communication. Even if you’re having a difficult conversation, focus on something positive. Top leaders are good at finding the silver lining.

Charismatic communicators are interesting, but they also share interesting information with others.They focus on innovation and new ideas that give people a spark.

Summary

You can learn to communicate more effectively by following these tips from top leaders. Practice these skills as often as possible. You’ll have many opportunities each day. Every time you have a conversation with anyone is an opportunity to practice a little more. And as you know, practice makes perfect!

Vision, Purpose, and Swimming with Dolphins

Leaders are supposed to provide vision, right? But if you’re in a senior manager role does that apply to you? You might say, “No, that’s the CEO’s job.”

I disagree. If you’ve been put in a leadership role, YOU, my friend, must cast the vision. Don’t wait on anyone else around you to do it.

For all the years I’ve been doing executive coaching, I still remain amazed at the frequency by which I find people with good job titles failing to have their own vision for things.

It’s Your Show

When you get selected or elected to a senior management role, the job is yours. With it comes the total responsibility for the success and outcome of your work team. People want vision. They need purpose.

It’s just not enough for people to show up to work each day. They come with questions about why. Specifically, why is my team here? What is this unit about? What does this department do? Can I get excited about our cause?

These questions become the leader’s responsibility to answer and answer well. If your team doubts any of this, they will refuse to buy-in. Their trust for you and the company will languish in the weeds. Soon they will start acting disenfranchised and unengaged with the work. They will just be going thru the motions.

On the other hand, if you can articulate a clear and concise story about the purpose for the team, then you’ll get much better buy-in. By casting a clear vision for the work and purpose, you will go much further to engage and inspire your team.

It’s not enough to say we’re here because…

You have to show them the landscape. Paint a beautiful picture of the possibilities and purpose. Give them their individual views.

Your vision becomes the rally point where the team can center their energy. Create a clear statement of the vision. Be sure the whole team knows what that might be. Don’t leave the understanding of the vision to chance.

Above all, don’t wait on leaders above you to cast the vision. Sure, you should take your vision and get alignment and approval from upper management, but don’t wait on that. Be bold!

The Entrepreneur’s Version

Small business needs the same inspiration from its owner/founder. It’s almost a given that a startup will have a vision. It makes perfect sense otherwise why startup?

Yet the original vision can suffer over time. As things progress, even owners can forget their original ideas. You get caught up in the day-to-day, making adjustments all the time. Then one day you wake up and the idea you had, the vision, is not there anymore. Your little baby has become something else.

If you own your business, take time to refresh and revisit your vision. Stuff does happen. You might have to adjust. But don’t lose sight of why you started what you started.

What do Dolphins Have to Do With This?

Nothing really. I just think they’re pretty cool.

Two dolphins happily swimming in the ocean. Digital illustration

Motivation Secrets of Great Leaders

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Great leaders know how to motivate others. Since the amount you can accomplish on your own is limited, it’s necessary to have the assistance of others.

Someone who can motivate others to do their best has an incredibly valuable talent.

When you can inspire others, you can accomplish much more.

Motivate others to do their best:

Be emotionally supportive. To help others shine, removing the fear of failing or looking foolish is critical. Most people are frozen by fear and prefer to remain comfortable. When fear is greater than motivation, nothing happens. Removing fear can be just as effective as instilling additional motivation.

Provide additional support. Ask what resources are required. Does your employee require additional help or funds to get a project off the ground? Perhaps your child needs a tutor or assistance with creating a resume. Determine what resources are required for success and provide them.

Support is not limited to financial or physical resources. Support means standing alongside; proving you have their back.

Follow up regularly. Show that you care by monitoring their progress. It’s enough to ask and then listen. Asking questions will also help to keep them on track.

Don’t micromanage. Hold people accountable for measurable and attainable goals. Think about Goldilocks – ‘not too big, not too small, but just right.’ That’s the way to set expectations.

Be publically supportive. It’s one thing to support an employee in the privacy of your office. It’s quite another to be supportive in front of his/her co-workers. Parents are guilty of this, too. Avoid only supporting your children around the dinner table. Support them in public also.

Acknowledge and reward. Acknowledge progress and effort regularly. Everyone needs a little boost now and then. Ideally, give acknowledgment publically. Conversely, your disgruntlement and any discipline should be handled privately. It’s as simple as handling praise and reprimands most effectively.

Still More to Think About

Ask for ideas. You might hear a few ideas that are better than your own. It’s easier for others to get excited about their own ideas than to get excited about yours. Using ideas from your team will create a sense of purpose and involvement.

There’s a keen focus on empowerment and inclusion in today’s business. Executives are talking about collaboration too. It all goes together very well toward creating a collaborative environment where people’s ideas are welcome.

Be clear. Vagueness breeds confusion. Confusion saps enthusiasm. It is said ‘a confused mind says NO.’ Leaders need to create clarity.

When the objective and the necessary steps are clear, motivation is easier to generate. Ensure that everyone is clear on their roles.

Set a good example. If it’s important to you, it will be important to your employees, spouse, or children. Don’t just tell them it’s important, but show them by your behavior. Make the objective a priority in your own life.

Create a vision. Paint a picture of the end results in the minds of those involved. The work is not always enjoyable, but it’s the end result that matters. Then keep reminding everyone of how great things will be when it’s over. The work is the path to reach that endpoint.

Deal swiftly with dissenters. It only takes one dissenting, charismatic employee to bring the whole thing crashing down. There’s often one complainer that tries to undermine the enthusiasm of everyone else. Don’t underestimate the damage this one person can do. Have a heart-to-heart conversation with them or move them out of the group.

Play the Whole Game

Motivation isn’t just about adding positive energy. It’s also about removing obstacles. Dissenters are obstacles.

Encourage the sharing of opinions. However, once a decision has been made, expect cooperation.

Encourage others to do their best work or to follow their dreams. Motivating others is a skill that anyone can develop. You can only be as successful as your team. Avoid the belief that you can do it all alone. You can’t.

Great leaders inspire others to be overachievers. It’s a challenging task, but if you’re good at motivating others, you’ll always be one of the most important people around.

Top 10 Essential Leadership Skills

leadership banner

It’s all about skills in the modern world. It’s never been more challenging to be a leader than it is today. Markets and entire industries are changing rapidly. For any leader to be successful, it’s important to have the proper skills.

There are thousands of books describing good leadership. You can find lists of skills and attributes in most of those books. But if you want to be a good leader, you need to find a solid list and get busy embracing what it says. Many of the names and terms are interchangeable. So find a good list and run with it.

Many of these skills are evergreen. For example, leaders will always need to be able to communicate well and delegate tasks. Some are table stakes. Take heart that your leadership skills will be valuable for a long time!

Here is a good list to start with.

Shore up these 10 leadership skills and protect your future:

The ability to motivate others. Great leaders are great motivators. Think about how you motivate yourself. It’s not that much different to motivate someone else.

Communication skills. Leaders must be excellent communicators. This includes public speaking, addressing small groups, and one-on-one. Remember to practice good listening skills. Fortunately, educational materials abound and there are plenty of willing victims to practice your skills upon.

Delegation skills. You can’t do it all alone. Many high-achievers have trouble letting go and giving up control. You must be able to trust others and use them in the most effective way possible. It’s not enough to just delegate, you must delegate assignments to the those who will excel in that particular task.

Create the proper culture. Leaders must create a culture that matches the industry and the employees. A Wall Street investment bank has a different culture than an elementary school or a pharmaceutical company. Even departments may have their own unique culture.

Adaptability. The challenges facing leaders change regularly. Industries change. Customers change. Economic conditions change. Technology is rapidly changing the way organizations do business. Leaders have to be able to evolve to meet the changing landscape.

Still more leadership skills to consider

Time management. Leaders are busy. There’s always more to do than there are hours in the day. Choosing the most important tasks and making the time to complete them is paramount. Time management skills are easily learned, but don’t come naturally to many people.

Relationship management. Great leaders have strong relationships with their direct reports, hourly employees, executives, and customers. The stronger your relationships, the more you can accomplish. During great challenges, your relationships can make you or break you.

Change management. Leading an organization or department through change is a valuable skill to develop. As companies add technology and reduce workforces, change comes more rapidly.

Be a good follower. Leaders have to follow, too. Leaders that don’t follow are considered dictators. Once you inspire a team, they become largely self-sufficient. It is then your job to follow and provide occasional guidance.

Poise. Leaders face challenges. Poise is a necessary trait for a leader to possess. Without poise, small challenges become bigger, and employees lose faith. When you’re stressed and panicked, your employees are uncomfortable. Build your poise if you want to excel as a leader.

How do your skills measure up?

You can try to predict your success as a manager from this list of skills.

Leaders are much more than Managers. Good managers run processes. Leaders inspire people.

Build your leadership skills and your long-term results will be enhanced. Even with all the big changes in modern businesses, leadership skills continue to be highly valued in the workplace. Great leaders are always in high demand.

If you need help working to understand these or any other leadership skills, I can help.

I offer a free, no-obligation, no upsell exploratory call so you can share your needs. Then we can talk about ways to help. Just click Https://DougThorpe.com/chat